Goodbye?

How do you say goodbye?

Emotionally.

I miss everything. At night, I sit and think about every little thing I miss. Just going through my computer, I run across things that remind me of him. It makes it next to impossible to move on.

I've tried to file away everything I can, so as not to come across it. But then I come across The Goofy Movie. Which was one of his favorites. And he sang the entire movie as we watched it together. While I laughed the entire time. Pictures of us together. We had such a blast, and he was so proud of having me by his side. We'd sit in bed together, passing the vodka bottle back and forth. Sharing funny memes and videos. I'm trying so hard to move past this, but I swear something is wrong with me.

I can't let people go. I can't say goodbye. I just can't. I hate that it's so easy for him to let me go.

I keep looking at my phone. Even though I know he won't, and I know that he shouldn't. I keep waiting for him to text me. Just so I know that he's thinking about me. But he's not.

I just want the hurt to go away. I want the little crease in between my eyebrows to go away. I want to the aching in my chest to go away. I want to stop having to wipe my nose, and my eyes. I want to catch my breath for once. I want to forget about him.

So bad.