It is The DJ's birthday.
And I keep playing Unhappy Birthday by The Smiths. Over and over again.
I had so many plans when we were together. I spoke to friends to do paintings, and a cool remix of The Portal song. I had so many plans.
Fuck. I am trying to think of what to say. But the confusion is unbearable at this point. The sadness is unbearable. There is going to be a huge party Friday. And I won't be there.
He wonders why I am so sad.
It's because I loved him so much. I cared about him. I would have done anything for him.
What it comes down to. The pain, the hurt. No one wants to know that the person you love more than anyone, doesn't want to be with you. With me.
It's consuming. It doesn't make sense in my mind. I cannot think of anything else.
Happy Birthday Mister.
Drink and be ill tonight. From the one you left behind.
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Being Single in the SLC
1 comments:
Rough night. I'm so sorry. There's nothing anyone can say that will bring relief or won't sound trite, but it WILL pass. It might be slow, pain will subside bit by bit, and it won't be easy. BUT...you'll be stronger.
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