After not being strong enough to not look at his posts, I decided to deactivate my Facebook account. It hurts too damn much to see that he is hooking up with girls. Even if I delete him, I see his friends posting about things. And so, done with that for a while.
Also, at 4:30 in the morning, my roomie told me she doesn't want to live with me anymore. I fall asleep with shows on, because the noise comforts me. And I guess it was too loud. So, it looks like I will be moving back in with my parents.
I keep telling myself that things can only get better. But it just isn't working out that way. I can't figure out if I should just disappear or not. What would be the best option for me? I need friends, but I'm not brave enough to bother anyone in my worst moments.
I'm not giving up yet.
3 comments:
I'm sorry you're going through all of this. Things will get better, they will. If you ever want to join me on a jog or a hike you're welcome to. I always think in the middle of kicking your own ass is when it's hardest to be sad.
It WILL get better. Easy to say, easy to know objectively, but that doesn't make dealing with any of this any easier.
You're a badass, though. So you'll dig through it all and be stronger for it, I have no doubt. :)
Good for you still fightin' the good fight! Keep it up. You're a strong woman and a valuable friend. :)
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